My Life

 A few months ago we were watching PUP Academy and one of the pups told another 'you don't need to help me because you HAVE TO but because YOU WANT TO'. There is a difference in attitude don't you think? Remember the things you have done because of the dogmas of 'I should', 'I must', 'I have to' and the things you have done because you willing did because 'you wanted to'. There must be a great difference.  Christmas is round the corner and so many decisions need to be made. Sometimes unfortunately, festive seasons can be stressful. We  allow them to be so because we do things we think we have to but really don't want to.You may want to stay home and just be but feel you have to travel...  Hope this year 2020, we can have a stress free Christmas, let us strive to do what we can because we want to and not because we have to.

 As parents/guardians, we strive to give our children a good and stable life. Unfortunately, no matter what we do, we can not shield them from the storms of life but we can provide them with a tool that can carry them through life . Introducing your children to God's Word and salvation, I believe is the greatest gift you can offer  them. Read an extract from 8 Positive Attitudes by Robert Schuller.

 Grace of Lament A friend has shared this sermon on grace of lament( https://www.capitolhillbaptist.org/sermon/the-grace-of-lament/#.XXZWMZyeLCg.whatsapp ). It is insightful, helpful and freeing. Thanks friend (you know yourself). Psalms 77:1‭-‬9 NIV I cried out to God for help; I cried out to God to hear me.  When I was in distress, I sought the Lord; at night I stretched out untiring hands, and I would not be comforted.  I remembered you, God, and I groaned; I meditated, and my spirit grew faint.  You kept my eyes from closing; I was too troubled to speak.  I thought about the former days, the years of long ago;  I remembered my songs in the night. My heart meditated and my spirit asked:  “Will the Lord reject forever? Will he never show his favor again?  Has his unfailing love vanished forever? Has his promise failed for all time?  Has God forgotten to be merciful? Has he in anger withheld his compassion?”

As we go through grief or have our loved ones go through seasons of loss, we can find comfort that there is time for everything under the sun. A Time for Everything 1For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven. 2A time to be born and a time to die. A time to plant and a time to harvest. 3A time to kill and a time to heal. A time to tear down and a time to build up. 4A time to cry and a time to laugh. A time to grieve and a time to dance. 5A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones. A time to embrace and a time to turn away. 6A time to search and a time to quit searching. A time to keep and a time to throw away. 7A time to tear and a time to mend. A time to be quiet and a time to speak. 8A time to love and a time to hate. A time for war and a time for peace. Look keenly at the above and therein are seasons of life, some great others not so great. As you moan, allow yourself to be in that season. t is okay not to be okay. Another season will come,

Words we can learn to use I care about you. He/she will be dearly missed. You are important to me. My condolences. I hope you find some peace today. Be kind to yourself. I'm here for you. I wish I could take your pain away. Let me know if there's anything I can do for you. I am saddened to hear about (deceased's name) passing. I am so sorry that you are going through this. I can't imagine what you're feeling, but I am totally here for you. Know that I will be here to support you through all of this. Nothing I say can change what happened, but I am here for you and your family during this time. My heart hurts knowing that (deceased's name) has passed away. I've lost a loved one before and can imagine what you may be feeling. Know that it's okay to feel however you want to feel during this time and I will be here for you. May the memories of (deceased's name) bring you peace Source: https://dying.lovetoknow.com/Words_to_Comfort_Someone_Grieving

 Words we can learn to use. I know I can’t make your pain go away, but I want you to know I’m here with a shoulder or an ear or anything else you need.” “Thinking of your family with love and wanting to help out in any way I can.  I’ll call to see when would be a good night to bring over a meal.” “You’ve got so much on your mind and on your heart right now. We hope it will make one less worry to know that  I will be taking care of the xyz for as long as you need.” “I know this must be a very difficult and demanding time for you all. We are keeping you in our thoughts and prayers. If there is anything we can do, please let us know.” Source:Sympathy Ideas https://ideas.hallmark.com/articles/sympathy-ideas/what-to-write-in-a-sympathy-card/

 Words that Wound In my younger days, a distant relative's dad died and standing beside her by the graveside as the body was being lowered, I rubbed her back and whispered 'it is well'. She turned back and shouted at me that it was not well. I was shocked and felt helpless at the time. In retrospect, she was right 'it was not well with her'. How was she and her siblings going to live without their dad? The pain of loss at the time could definetely not make things be well. Fast forward, Jaden dies and we are the ones to be comforted by people who genuinely love and care for us. At the time, we were 32years, with a soon to be 3year old daughter and born again. We heard words like the ones I used many times before without really putting them in context. It is well, let him rest in peace, it's God's will, he is in a better place, you are young you will get others, God will give you twins, at least you have one. God gives and takes, you are strong, you will make

 There is no destination, loss is a journey. We learn to cope without our loved ones. We moan the past, present and future. We wish we had more time, to hug, to love and to say the right things. We wish we cherished the precious moments together. We moan the present, doing life together, facing victories, challenges and celebrating milestones. We miss the birthdays, the anniversaries that we would have celebrated. We moan the future, the birthdays, the graduations, the milestones, the weddings and life together. Be gentle on yourself, when you drive past a, place that bears memories, or listen to a song that reminds you of your loved, it's okay to miss them. To date, there are songs I can't stand , I sang them to Jaden and I am gentle on myself. I walk away or switch to another channel. Be aware of what triggers set you onto an emotional roller coaster. Again know, this was your loved one, you have or heard memories and dreams and it is okay to miss and grief them. For the comm

 I heard this song Truth Be Told by Matthew West this morning. I like the lyrics, it's okay not to be okay. https://youtu.be/j4wYkS8Z3Io

  Days after the burial are difficult to face. The community of support return to their normal routines . People return to work, ceremonies like baby showers, birthdays, weddings and get togethers continue, after all that's how life is. However, as these go on the bereaved is feeling lost and stuck. Questions like how can people be smiling and be happy while am hollow and lost? Why isn't my loved one here to celebrate a milestone with me? Many events or lack of them trigger emotions. Facing a day seems like facing a giant. For the bereaved, be gentle on yourself. You can say no to events or gatherings that overwhelm you. It is easy to pity party and resent your family and friends for moving on. Please know that is life and when your world stops, it's not their fault. They will support when they can or ask for support and sensitized them on what hurts or where you are at. Guard your heart. For the community of support, be patient with the bereaved. Do not isolate them from

 Practical Things Community of Support Can Do On Day of Burial 1.Ensure bereaved have a meal /breakfast before leaving home.  2.Carry water, energy giving drink/glucose/snack, box of tissues /handkerchiefs 3.Allow the bereaved be present during the ceremony if possible. Some people whisk the bereaved away when they are overcome by grief. Try calm them down, get a chair but allow them to be present. 4. Try to be comfortable with tears and expression of emotions. If you are uncomfortable subconsciously you try and silence the bereaved. If you comfortable with emotions, you can give the bereaved time to cry and try calm them with wisdom. 5.If there are children, assign an adult to take care of their needs during the burial but allow them to be as present as possible and with the family. 6. After the burial, do not be in a rush to move the family away from burial site. Be patient with them. 7. Please do not leave immediately after the ceremony of you able to. Give the family some warmth wi

13th November, 2012 was the day of Jaden's burial. I don't know your experience but it felt like a dream, like am there but not there. Going through the motions of the day, wondering if it's true. The bereaved is in a state but amazingly I remember a small section of the sermon by Pastor David Obuki  'that there are treasures in the darkness'.Isaiah 45:3 I will give you the treasures of darkness, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name.) Maybe that stuck because I wondered how can that be when am in a dark pit. I was touched by the Kileleshwa Covenant Community Church(K3C) community who hardly knew us but accepted to conduct Jaden's funeral with much grace.I also remember the kindness, warmth, love and support from family and friends. I remember the visits, the texts, the songs sent and gestures that reminded us that we were loved. I am thankful that we didn't have to stress about ho

  Dangers to look out for when grieving. #1 Do it my way Why aren’t you hurting as much as me or pull yourself together you too much. Be aware of each other’s style of grieving, observe and communicate. Extend grace to each other #2 I must be strong Sometimes we feel we need to be strong for the sake of others. Unfortunately, one may suppress their emotions and this may pop up later in life. Allow yourself to feel the emotions. Crying or feeling emotionally drained does not mean you are weak, it says you are human. Be self aware of what you are feeling. If something feels overwhelming, ask for help or support. #3 Resisting Change Death brings change. Our values, priorities and commitments fall under attack. Daily routines become hard, holidays and events may become a constant reminder of the loss. Sometimes we may resist the change by changing our values like indulge in substance abuse,infidelity or walking in bitterness. Death alters life forever. With time there is need to learn a n

#ChildlossAndRelationships 8 Years ago, Sylvia Wambui lost her son Jaden 29 days after birth. The loss of a child affects a couple in unimaginable ways. Now a Counselor, she briefly shares her experience and pointers on how a couple can cope. Please share with, or tag someone who might need this. Click > https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j2MnXNZ716s Supamamas YouTube. Like. Subscribe I am so thankful that Christine allowed me to share on child loss and has premiered it during Jaden's 8th anniversary. Am so humbled.

 When death occurs in a family, the family members grieve differently and we may miss out on the quiet ones or those who seem strong. In a couple situation, sometimes the man is forgotten yet he is hurting too. We may also miss out on the children and justify that they are too young to understand. We also forget close relatives like in our case grand parents, aunts/uncles or friends who loved the child as their own. As the community providing support to the bereaved family, let us look out for each family member  and close friend where possible. Pull them aside, chat and ask how they are doing. Talk to the children, allow them to be present when meetings are happening they are stakeholders too. Break down the loss to their level, as basic but as clear as possible. Allow them to cry or express their disappointment.

 After receiving news of death of a loved one, as one is grieving there are many things to be done regarding burial:where to bury, when to bury and how to bury. In Africa, relatives and the community start trickling in to comfort the family.  When a baby dies sometimes the family may have to decide whether to bury or allow hospital to do so.Sometimes the family may not know what to do or may just feel overwhelmed. Either way it's emotionally draining to make such decisions. I kept negotiating in my mind, this was not the plan, we were to take Jaden home not look for a funeral home andsite to bury him. Our family and friends supported us by accompanying us to hospital, pay bills, transfer baby to funeral home and assisted Alex in processing documents. They helped ask questions, ensure things were handled in a proper way. We never felt alone.  It is kind of the community to come visit the bereaved,it assures them of the love and support. Sometimes it can be overwhelming but for other

When Job had lost everything including his children, his wife was so bitter and asked him to curse God and die but he asked her a very difficult question. Will we only accept what is good from God and reject the bad? He is the God who gives and takes away and I will worship him. This must have been a very difficult space for the couple. I used to hear this song and wail. I wrestled with the words, especially the chorus( You give and take away, my heart will choose today to say blessed be your name) but like Job one must come to a place at some point and ask 'will you accept the good and reject the bad/challenges?'. https://youtu.be/PnWKehsOXu8

 Jaden passed on in hospital and some of my friends worried that if I came home and saw his clothes and Moses basket, my grieve would be aggrevated . Some felt that it may be wise to move them while others thought it wise to let things stay as they were. Am so glad that when I came home, his clothes and items were intact. A few years later, I chatted a friend who had a loss and she appreciated her friends gesture to move her baby's items. From this I learned that each of us grieve differently. For Jaden's clothes, I left them in place until I was ready many months later. I packed them in a suitcase while I gave out some. Again, ask the bereaved family what they want to do with their loved ones items, you don't have to remove even the portraits, it does not have to be done immediately. For some, they may perceive it as being insensitive to their loss.

 It's painful to watch as a loved one goes through loss. We feel helpless, afraid to do or say the wrong thing. One thing that may not go wrong or offend is the power of presence. Just being there but silent speaks volumes. Dear bereaved , we get offended by what people say or what they do or don't do. Guard your heart against offense because no one would intentionally hurt you. They are saying or doing what they think may comfort you. If possible guide them or confide in someone who can politely let them know that the words or actions are hurtful.

 No one is prepared for death and it comes as a shock both for the bereaved and the people the bereaved interact with like friends, colleagues, church, neighbours etc. The bereaved might be trying to come to terms with the loss and may need some time to process the shocking news. Ask them how you may be of support or help to them at the time. What is your immediate need?  Would they need help to get home, to the hospital, morgue or police station? Would they need airtime to communicate the loss or to help in planning for the burial? Do not be afraid to get in touch with the bereaved. Call, text, appear in person if possible and ask them how best you can support them.

  8Years Today Today is not an easy day but a grace filled day. I woke up and remembered that 8years ago, a day like this, we came face to face with death. Jaden, our second born son passed on 29days after birth. It was shocking, never thought babies die but ours did. We were ushered into the personal journey of grief, where facing everyday was like facing a giant of loss, grief and the emotions. Looking back, am thankful that God helped me stay sane. I asked Him many questions, I was confused as to why Jaden had to leave so soon yet he had not stayed too long. I remember the agony, the tears, the hollow feeling and emptiness I felt.I followed and trusted God in my pain and confusion. I could not pray, I could only listen to soft music to sooth me. I was afraid to be alone even in the shower and I carried my worship music with me. 8years, how did we get here after such a loss? It's not easy but telling myself that loss is a personal journey and that it can't be thrown into t

 Sometimes, I wish I was not in this category. Sometimes, I wish I didn't have to discuss about the flowers around Jaden's grave like I did yesterday, or pay bills to maintain the grave. I wish I was billed for his basic needs or extravagant demands. Sometimes I wish that Jaden stayed and didn't have to go home so soon. Thank you for creating awareness about child loss, it's an unending journey of grief but we moan with hope of seeing our babies soon. Jaden you are loved, it's almost 8years next month. 

 Our 10year old is a creative. The things she does, amaze us. Look what she compiled this morning, sweet memories of my 40th birthday. How can I enhance this talent?It is graphic design, to fashion design, to photography to music and dance. Any leads and mentors are welcome. 

 What a beautiful day this was. We agreed to introduce the children to Jaden because 2weeks ago I had the opportunity to share about loss on TV and on same week, I had a zoom session sharing on our marriage journey and loss. I did the zoom from our home and was fearful that Nate would stumble into our story of loss before we tell him yet we strive to be the first voice and to process issues together. Baby girl was young too and we talked about Jaden but after Nate was born and a bit older, we never discussed despite her being tempted once to tell Nate about Jaden and I told her he wasn't ready then. I was blessed that my beloved was in agreement that it's time and day was today.   Jaden passed on when Samara was 2years 11 months on November 10th,2012 and of course Nate was born 2years later. We got the photo album that we have of Jaden, a toy car I kept and a portrait that we used for his funeral. We didn't know how to start and after dinner, Alex in his wisdom (a God idea)

Last night as I prepared to share on loss& grief in relation to marriage, I was overwhelmed by emotions. Through our pain, we are able to reach out to other hurting families. Indeed God's ways are not ours but if we can just b used  as vessels of honour for God's kingdom then it's not wasted the pain is not wasted.

The past week has been a different kind. I have been privileged to share our loss journey on TV and this morning on 'a peek into a grieving heart platform. This song beauty for ashes seems to sum it all up. 

Who would have thought that after the loss of Jaden, God would use our pain to reach out to others who are hurting? It was humbling this morning to share our story with young people on Y254.  All glory to God. Sylvia

Introducing -  A PEEK INTO A GRIEVING HEART The TEARS Foundation, Kenya, has been trying to break the silence associated with child loss grief  among our communities  (pregnancy loss, stillbirth & infants/children death). There is a silent rule that these are not losses worthy grieving or talking about: when you do, you should “move with speed” and “move on” as if nothing happened. We know this silence coupled with societal attitudes has pushed families to dark pits. Siblings included. There is nothing as harmful as unacknowledged loss-unsupported/disenfranchised grief. Let us have this conversation. We have many issues eating into the fabric of our society, this is one of them - unacknowledged loss-unsupported/disenfranchised grief. We now have a forum, thought through since December 2019. It is time to bring it from the back burners. Invited speakers will help us  Peek Into A Grieving Heart after a child dies. Bring all your families and friends to this virtual forum.

This afternoon, I had a delivery in Lang'ata and purposed to pass by Jaden's grave. It had been a long while since I visited, but as I walked towards the grave, I was met with blooming yellow flowers that really warmed my heart. I had come with an agenda, I wanted to change the flowers around the grave and thankfully had Gitua who cleans and ensures the place is presentable give me a tour around the cemetery to showcase his work. I was amused within me, the things we do as a result of loss are strange yet have become normal to us.  After about an hour, I had picked a few yellow flowers put them carefully on the back seat and drove home in comoftable silence. No tears, no sad emotions just gratitude but it has been almost 8 years this November 2020.

My heart is full and so thankful.

A picture is worth a thousand words.Today,12th May,2020 was very special. We visited Tears Foundation's office and Joyce caught me off guard and requested that I honour Jaden. She explained that because of Jaden, I have got to know Tears Foundation and am now a peer companion, walking with others in their journey of child loss.  I sat, chose a green teddy(I love green for boys), wrote a small note and stuck it on the wall. That was special in itself,but Joyce was not done yet, she had a bracelet for mum. To remind me of the journey of loving Jaden in my heart and a precious stone(pendant) to remind me that Jaden is precious.  My heart is full, what a great gift,2days after mother's day celebration. Almost 7 years after my baby rested, I feel honoured by my three children(not sure you get it,but I do)  . Thank you Joyce , words cannot express what I feel right.Thank you Njoki for being a witness that there are indeed treasures in the dark.

My cousin sent this to the family Whatsapp group and it really captivated me. Indeed motherhood is a verb, a doing word. When we see Mother's day, we are happy about it and thankful that mothers are celebrated on this second Sunday of May. If mother is a verb, then it includes many other women. It includes mums in waiting, those who walk with others as though they are their own, those whose arms are empty because of loss or because of infertility challenges or those still waiting for a spouse. Another category of mothers are those whose marriages may have not worked out, or single mothers, or those with defiant children, or widowed, they may feel less of mothers but that's not true. A mother is a mother and we love them all. This day, let us celebrate all kinds of mothers because mothers are special and have huge hearts. Let us send them a text, call, email and remind them all that they are loved and special. Happy Mother's day to you. You are loved and appreciat

On April 25th, 2020, I received an interesting email from  Joyce,the  TEARS Foundation,Kenya Chapter  Leader &  Support Group Facilitator . She was informing us that every Sunday before Mother's Day , we celebrate International Bereaved Mother's day.  On this day the world celebrates and acknowledges all mothers , who had children but no longer have them in their arms. It does not matter  whether it was a  pregnancy loss, in between or adult loss. Child loss is child loss. It is not a day for pity party but a day to celebrate mothers, once a mother always a mother.  Hearing of International Bereaved Mother's day  for the first time brought much joy,having been a mother to Jaden (baby J) who passed on three weeks after birth in November 2012. My baby boy, our second born,  our first son, was a such a joy.We all loved him at first sight even his big sister(2 years at the time). I s there a day to celebrate bereaved fathers and siblings? After Jaden rested, I was in

Having stayed home with the children the past 7 weeks during Covid-19, I have come to appreciate each of them.What a privilege to be a mother.I love the kisses, hugs, cuddles, stories, disagreements, make ups after the fights, the innovation, the love for God and much much more. Last week, I was taking Nate through the 'Story of Me', a book series of God's Design For Sex that helps parents talk openly to children on their sexuality from a godly perspective. After our session,I went through the babies birth pictures and decided to put them all in one folder, something I have never done. These after birth photos capture precious moments in the delivery room.  Samara Jaden Nate We are in May, a new month and I have been reflecting on the gift of motherhood.  My heart is filled with much gratitude. Happy Mother's Day.

A new routine that am loving and appreciating is when our daughter comes to my bed, lies besides me and asks questions and am able to share my own childhood experiences on the same or she would read to me a story she likes. No w, our soon to be 6year old is a hugger and loves cuddles before going to bed. So it's been great bonding before bed despite being locked in together all day. Yesterday, I had both of them with me,  each on my side and I prayed over them as they snoozed away. I found myself thinking about their personalities, the differences and similarities and I wondered how  Jaden would be? Would he be calm like his sister or energetic like his brother? Who he have been strong willed as they are? What would he have loved to do before sleeping? Would he have appreciated some 'me time' with mummy, a cuddle or tickle from mummy? I lingered there for a short while, said a prayer, one of thanksgiving for the three babies, I have been blessed with. You see desp

Yesterday, I mentioned that one can have the blaming stance and this could be characterized by anger. Many are uncomfortable with anger, but we shouldn't because anger shows there is something more going on. However, what we do with the anger is what we should watch out for. Gottman, illustrates that anger is the tip of the iceberg, underneath are emotions/feelings of fear, rejection, anxiety, embarrassment and much more. So the next time you are angry, even in this uncertain times, ask yourself what is really going in within you then deal with the underlying feelings. Sylvia Wambui

Change is inevitable that is what we are told. The past few weeks, we have gone through change in so many things like the way we relate to each other, freedom of movement daytime and curfews   in the night ,we all have learned to keep time, 06:59:59 needs to find you home. Transactions are now cashless, meetings,fellowships and school are now virtual, strange times indeed. I am convinced that with this change , our lives will never be the same again. Diane Heller says that all humans are born with an amazing capacity to survive, heal and thrive. That is great encouragement. However, the past few weeks, I have wondered what it is like for those families that are grieving. With the government guidelines on funerals like conduct funerals in the shortest time, social distancing, limiting number of people who can attend the funeral ,I wonder how these families are coping with these changes? How does the grieving family chose who makes it to the list of attendance? I can’t imagine the

Watching Citizen News, am glad that people are aware that the current season poses stress to individuals and families. Stress about Covid-19,jobs,finances and the future poses a risk to relationships in the home. In other countries that have experienced lock downs, there has been a rise in domestic violence and divorce.This is alarming but because of the stress and sharing the same space a long time, it's not a surprise. You may not have a relationship challenge but anxiety or need to think through your new normal/routines, we as counsellors are here. Kindly reach out, allow us to support you and journey through this together. Inbox me or text me and we can schedule a time to talk. Sylvia

This week in our virtual Tandaza Group(Bible Study), we focused on the 2Kings 7:3-20 the story of the 4 lerpers who were at the entrance of the city gate(outcasts/rejects of course). Yet, the Lord used their courage or desperation(v. 4 if we stay here we die, if we go to the enemy's camp, they either spare us or kill us) to save a kingdom. Were they aware that God was using them for something greater? Each step the four lerpers took, sounded like chariots and horses and a great army in the enemy's camp. I am sure the lerpers were just trying to survive not knowing that their act of courage or desperation was instilling fear in the enemy's camp and saving a starving kingdom. My lesson among many is that each of us matters. We are not insignificant. That prayer you whisper, that act of kindness, that job you do that makes you feel unappreciated or of 'low standing' in society, that tea you offer the guards, that smile or call matters. Like a video shared yesterday

This is loss and grief. Tomorrow is Friday and will mark end of Week 3 staying at home. Initially, we may have been excited that we don't have to be stuck in traffic or save a few coins while we are indoors,but now week 1 has become week 2 and now week 3. We are now getting bored, tired, restless, missing our normal lives and can give anything to go back to our routines but friends we shall never be the same after this, we may have to find a new normal. What we may be experiencing is loss and grief and it is normal. Yes, it is normal. You see when loss occurs, whether of a loved one, a job, a relationship or item you loved, we go through various (e) motions. We go through denial,numbness, bargaining, anger, sadness, and 'acceptance'. Can you identify with any of the emotions? I sure can. Please don't be deceived that these emotions flow systematically. Today you may feel that you have the strength to face the day after a trigger like watching a press briefing, o

Alert:This may be uncomfortable to read Acts of kindness go a long way. A grieving parent and friend decided to ensure my son's grave was clean as they did the same for their  child. Strange that only in the mortuary, I am called by Jaden's name(Mama Jaden). She shared a photo of Jaden's grave with me today and it blessed my heart. It may have been just a simple act of kindness but for me it was so thoughtful because almost 8years now, I have never thought to take a photo, maybe my emotions or state of mind don't allow but that someone thought of my child, hired someone to clean the grave and share a picture with me, that was so special. So even as we go through this strange season, let us remember that acts of kindness to those around us will go a long way. Check on a friend who works in a hospital, or a teacher who is receiving calls from parents, or a pastor who needs to hear God and be a channel of hope or a parent who is worried about the next meal or some

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 There is a season for everything. A popular chapter to most of us. There is a season (a time appointed) for everything and a time for every delight and event or purpose under heaven—  A time to be born and a time to die; A time to plant and a time to uproot what is planted.  A time to kill and a time to heal; A time to tear down and a time to build up.  A time to weep and a time to laugh; A time to mourn and a time to dance.  A time to throw away stones and a time to gather stones; A time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing.  A time to search and a time to give up as lost; A time to keep and a time to throw away.  A time to tear apart and a time to sew together; A time to keep silent and a time to speak.  A time to love and a time to hate; A time for war and a time for peace. Ecclesiastes 3:1‭-‬8 AMP https://bible.com/bible/1588/ecc.3.1-8.AMP Last week I was asked to reflect on these verses and identify which season I was in terms of my relationsh

“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past.  See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland. Isaiah 43:18‭-‬19 NIV https://bible.com/bible/111/isa.43.18-19.NIV As I read and reflected on this verse, I realised that many of us are wounded but have become numb because we are used to carrying the wounds with us. They have become ours yet there is another way to live life. We can face our pains, name them, see the impact they have had and have on us and those around us and then surrender them to God. Then experience the new dawn. Yes the scar will be there but will be faced with courage and reminder that it once hurt but not anymore. So you may be hurt or wounded by issues in life. But this verse says that it is possible to forget with God's help and focus on the new thing He is doing. May we forge ahead past our wounds this year.