Skip to main content

Beautiful Day 9th August, 2020

 What a beautiful day this was. We agreed to introduce the children to Jaden because 2weeks ago I had the opportunity to share about loss on TV and on same week, I had a zoom session sharing on our marriage journey and loss. I did the zoom from our home and was fearful that Nate would stumble into our story of loss before we tell him yet we strive to be the first voice and to process issues together. Baby girl was young too and we talked about Jaden but after Nate was born and a bit older, we never discussed despite her being tempted once to tell Nate about Jaden and I told her he wasn't ready then. I was blessed that my beloved was in agreement that it's time and day was today. 

 Jaden passed on when Samara was 2years 11 months on November 10th,2012 and of course Nate was born 2years later. We got the photo album that we have of Jaden, a toy car I kept and a portrait that we used for his funeral. We didn't know how to start and after dinner, Alex in his wisdom (a God idea), picked a paper and pen and started to draw our family tree and beautifully introduced Jaden especially to Nate(6yrs) as born 2years after baby girl, our second born, his brother then him as the third born. Oh, it warmed my heart and Samara started crying and that was okay. She said she could not remember much about him but remembers hugging him. Nate needed to internalize what happens when you don't breath and Alex patiently, calmly explained to him and he took it in. We then introduced them to Jaden's portrait, then photo album from his delivery (October, 13th),the day he came home and Samara loved him, moments shared with family and Samara finally saw the picture that reminds her of her hugging him. It was a beautiful and intimate moment. 

She cried abit more, and we had to decide what we want to do with the car and the big photo portrait. We agreed that when Samara is ready, we shall put the wooden toy car somewhere visible and when daddy is ready we shall put the photo portrait up too.We held hands, I was requested to pray and barely made it through the prayer but in tears and whispers thanked God for our complete family(Jaden included) and the ministry we have been called to, walking with the broken hearted.Nate cried finally, maybe because he saw mummy cry and his sister but he was safe in Alex's arms. 

After the prayer, Samara picked the paper with our family tree, wrote the Karega Family Tree and smiled. That warmed my heart and I knew we are ok. We agreed that October 13th,we can freely celebrate Jaden and maybe visit his grave together. 

So thankful that God gave us courage and opportunity to introduce our baby J, to his siblings on this day 9th August, 2020.We agreed to watch a family series we have been watching and drank tea together. A beautiful day indeed. My heart is full especially to know that we are a family of 5 but Jaden is in heaven waiting for us, someday soon.

Blessings Sylvia 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Unconditional love

As I went home last yesterday, I heard the song 'In harms way'  by BeBe Winans, Rhett Lawrence, Margaret Bell-Byars. When listening to music, I want to know the lyrics,what the song is communicating and how it applies in my life. This song reminds me of God's unconditional love, even when I do not deserve it, even when I have given up , even when he knows all He knows about me, he doesn't let go of me. That is just amazing. Undying love you've given to me Seen in me things I would never have seen I don't understand why you care so much, it's all a mystery Time and time again I ask myself What have I done to deserve such wealth The price you paid, I could never repay your generosity Chorus: In wanting to save me In order to save the day Because of love you placed yourself In harm's way It's truly beyond me Left without a word to say What kind of love would place itself In harm's way? What kind of love would place itself In harm...
Post a Comment
Read more

Weight-Part 2

Once the baby is breastfeeding and starts to wean, the eyes shift from the mother to the child. Common comments ‘ what are you feeding your baby on? They are growing so well. During baby clinics, pressure mounts because your child's weight gain doesn't seem to match that of another or a friend's child. Next time you take the baby for vaccination open your ears and eyes. It’s like people are sizing each other up, or trying to boost their image especially if their baby “seems” to be ahead of others. I know this is a sensitive topic but all am saying is, yes the mother/parents have worked pretty hard to ensure that their baby is growing well and that is ok and we appreciate the good job done, but hey do we stop to think about that other woman/family who is feeling like a failure because as per the society as long as your baby is not growing as well as we expect, the mother( most times) isn't doing a good job? Do we ask ourselves why isn't that child not growing as...
6 comments
Read more
Looking back at where I am today and where the 8-4-4 system had placed me, I thank God that He has a purpose and plan for all of us. At times I wonder whether I will be able to tell my kids that I was never in the top 10 position in class. Most of our parents have told us how they were position 1 in their class and I always wonder who was last? Think about it. I envy today’s young generation. Having being raised in Kericho and Nakuru in my younger days, I didn’t know English too well and at 6 years I was speaking broken English. My first birthday was so memorable and exciting in that I could not say birthday and would welcome my friends and visitors by saying ‘welcome to my passday’. Oh well ,thank God that we catch up quick and I went to Milimani Primary and later Nairobi Primary and my report forms would read “ Sylvia is very playful and can do better if she settled down" or "slight imporvement but can do better". Class 8 came and I scored 432/700, and that was ok...
4 comments
Read more