As we prepared for our wedding and marriage, we both had changes in our career. Alex was working in the private sector and we worried about the working hours especially on Saturdays.He applied and got a job in a parastal, and was to start the new job in November soon after our wedding. We were excited because we thought being in a parastatal would allow him more time for our young family.
In mid August, 2 months before our wedding, my contract was not renewed and I was without a job until November when I got an internship at an NGO. It was a complete shift from being in the corporate world but I liked the place because it dealt with women and girl child issues and it was very close to our home. The first few months into our marriage were quite enjoyable. We both arrived home by 5.30p.m had had the whole evening to ourselves. We loved our new life and for me I thought it would remain like that.
Reality checked in, when I started getting assignments out of town which demanded that I travel. Alex, also got busy and started planning for evening and weekend events. Our careers seemed to have just changed, yet I was not ready to change. I started to resent the weekends and night outs and did not support my beloved. He would say he is travelling and I would be depressed. In my mind this was not the plan.The plan was to finish work at 5p.m.,hang out together and enjoy life. Now these changes were just so hard for me.
Many evenings, I would sit at home and wait for Alex. I would pray and ask God to give me grace to receive him well once he came, however when he arrived, I would be furious at him. I didn't want to understand how he had a hard day , I complained about the long hours I was home alone.Looking back today, I think it was all about me, am being polite, I was selfish. When I would be late at work, Alex would gladly wait for me or he would come pick me up and never lament.
With time now, I have learned to be more accommodating and supportive.I think about him more and not just about me and Samara. I understand that he is not just in the office and refusing to come home.I understand that he is trying his best to complete the assignments on time. I understand that he is working so hard for our family and the best I can do is support him. Of course, we agree that he should have us at the top of his priorities and what can be done the next day can be left. So we meet him at the door with smiles,hugs and kisses. We catch up on the day and I have noticed we are both happier. Even Samara is happy to have him home.
The past month he has travelled alot, even as I write he is away for three long nights and four days. We miss him a lot yet my perspective of his work has changed. I appreciate his work, the effort he puts in balancing family and career life. I am proud of how he manages to handle the pressure of organising events in such a short time and them being a success despite disappointments from suppliers. When he comes home, we love him and tell him how we treasure the moments we share together as a family.
But am glad that my mind had shifted before all these travelling. Am glad that its not all about me but its all about us.It has not been easy but its possible, and its a journey.Through these challenges , I have learned that its very important to support each other. When you know you have the support of your loved one, your performance is better and you are happier.
Hun am so proud of you and am sure where you are at today is preparing you for greater things in the near future. May you become the best that you can be and may I be that supportive wife that you desire. I have always been challenged by your loyalty, you always give your all, you do your best and you challenge me do the same in my career.
In mid August, 2 months before our wedding, my contract was not renewed and I was without a job until November when I got an internship at an NGO. It was a complete shift from being in the corporate world but I liked the place because it dealt with women and girl child issues and it was very close to our home. The first few months into our marriage were quite enjoyable. We both arrived home by 5.30p.m had had the whole evening to ourselves. We loved our new life and for me I thought it would remain like that.
Reality checked in, when I started getting assignments out of town which demanded that I travel. Alex, also got busy and started planning for evening and weekend events. Our careers seemed to have just changed, yet I was not ready to change. I started to resent the weekends and night outs and did not support my beloved. He would say he is travelling and I would be depressed. In my mind this was not the plan.The plan was to finish work at 5p.m.,hang out together and enjoy life. Now these changes were just so hard for me.
Many evenings, I would sit at home and wait for Alex. I would pray and ask God to give me grace to receive him well once he came, however when he arrived, I would be furious at him. I didn't want to understand how he had a hard day , I complained about the long hours I was home alone.Looking back today, I think it was all about me, am being polite, I was selfish. When I would be late at work, Alex would gladly wait for me or he would come pick me up and never lament.
With time now, I have learned to be more accommodating and supportive.I think about him more and not just about me and Samara. I understand that he is not just in the office and refusing to come home.I understand that he is trying his best to complete the assignments on time. I understand that he is working so hard for our family and the best I can do is support him. Of course, we agree that he should have us at the top of his priorities and what can be done the next day can be left. So we meet him at the door with smiles,hugs and kisses. We catch up on the day and I have noticed we are both happier. Even Samara is happy to have him home.
The past month he has travelled alot, even as I write he is away for three long nights and four days. We miss him a lot yet my perspective of his work has changed. I appreciate his work, the effort he puts in balancing family and career life. I am proud of how he manages to handle the pressure of organising events in such a short time and them being a success despite disappointments from suppliers. When he comes home, we love him and tell him how we treasure the moments we share together as a family.
But am glad that my mind had shifted before all these travelling. Am glad that its not all about me but its all about us.It has not been easy but its possible, and its a journey.Through these challenges , I have learned that its very important to support each other. When you know you have the support of your loved one, your performance is better and you are happier.
Hun am so proud of you and am sure where you are at today is preparing you for greater things in the near future. May you become the best that you can be and may I be that supportive wife that you desire. I have always been challenged by your loyalty, you always give your all, you do your best and you challenge me do the same in my career.
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