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Not Yet There

Am coming to understand that grieving is a journey that one can't quite say that they have arrived at a NO GRIEF destination. I am so glad that I do not cry every day, many days go by now without thinking about Jaden or looking at his picture. I am grateful  now that not all mornings do not have to be prayer requests to get strength and courage to get out of bed& face the day. Indeed things are brighter now, more laughter, peace and contentment are my portion.

Yet, am not at that point where I can say am healed. I think of a wound/scar. At times we maybe deceived by looking at the top scar and think that all is well, yet full recovery is required on the inside. That is where I am at,a place where I ackowledge, I am not fully healed and its ok. Of course at times I beat myself about feeling down but what's the rush? Healing comes from God and takes time. I have come across ladies who lost there babies 12years ago and when the thought crosses their minds, the pain is fresh.

So today, I shall purpose to go easy on myself. I shall not feel guilty for feeling down or  for not attending a funeral meeting. I shall not feel guilty for unsubscribing from certain support groups. I am guarding this delicate heart of mine from pains and hurts for now that is what I need and it is well.

Comments

tentmakingmums said…
I read grace and the Love of God upon your life....He is with you, even when you don't imagine it. He never leaves us.
4 June 2013 at 11:40
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