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Showing posts from November, 2012

A day at a time

I love God because He holds our world and no matter how much at times you want time to stop, it just moves on. God created time so that we have new days, with new grace and mercies. Everyday we take a step towards healing and I strongly believe that, I find that amazing and wonderful. Last Friday, baby gal was closing school and they had a number of presentations. She did the opening prayer and it was so special to us. She prayed so confidently, holding the microphone and praying with all sincerity. I cried as my heart melted. They had other presentations, some she chose to just stand and stare, maybe stage fright and some she danced so well. So we have been home with her since then and it has been great just playing, bathing her, going for walks with her. She has really become independent and keeps reminding me she is big. She has also been very firm on asking for a pink big bicycle.We did some window shopping and saw some orange and purple ones with her and she was very clear that ...

You Hold My World-Israel Houghton

 I heard this song on Sunday by Israell Houghton and it blessed my heart. You can listen on You Tube http://youtu.be/P6_T29ZaxyE Take my heart Lord will You take my heart As I surrender to Your will I confess Your are my righteousness And until You move me I'll be still And know that You are God YOU HOLD MY WORLD IN YOUR HANDS YOU HOLD MY WORLD IN YOUR HANDS AND I AM AMAZED AT YOUR LOVE I AM AMAZED THAT YOU LOVE ME YOU HOLD MY WORLD IN YOUR HANDS YOU HOLD MY WORLD IN YOUR HANDS AND I'M NOT AFRAID MY WORLD IS SAFE IN YOUR HANDS OH IN YOUR HANDS Take my life Lord will You take my life You are the reason that I live I believe You have forgiven me And by Your grace I will forgive And I know that You are God And know that You are God You won't let go of me You won't let go of me You won't let go of me You won't let go never let go You will take care of me You will take care of me You will take care of me You will take care always ta...

I choose to give thanks

I have been seeing alot on thanksgiving and today I choose to give thanks. "Enter His gates with thanksgiving and His courts with praise. Give thanks to Him, bless His name." -Psalm 100:4  I am thankful to be alive and well. Grateful that I know Jesus as my Saviour and that He died for me and loves me. I thank God for my family. I thank God for my one in a million husband, a father to Samara and Jaden. My beloved is the best companion that has and can walk with me through the various seasons of life. I am thankful for baby gal, yesterday she told me she isn't called baby gal, she is growing too fast. I thank God for her energy, her smile and laughter. Today, she did not want to leave me home as she wanted to be sure that I shall make it to her school concert and watch her dance. I am looking forward to seeing her perform. Samara reminds us of God's faithfulness, we are so blessed to have her, she has a beautiful her and will always be big sister. I am also thankful ...

A voice of hope

I am listening to "A voice of hope-Trusting God Again" on http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=8xpDRqZDKKs#at=270 Was all this about trust?  Do I really trust Him? Did I ever trust Him? Did He want me trust Him more?

The rawness of grief

I woke up this morning feeling very moody. I was feeling quite impatient even with baby gal as I prepared her for school and kept telling myself I can’t do this when I felt she was not cooperating. Well, a close relative, with all the love wrote me an email yesterday stating that “we need a chat on the causes of congenital heart defect which are partly unknown but also genetically caused. While one can do nothing about the genetic component the environmental association can be controlled especially within the first three months of pregnancy. You need to keep healthy, minimize stress and gain some weight” . Frankly speaking, this is an area I would rather steer clear away from because it brings out my greatest fears. You know baby gal had an open heart surgery in October 2011 to close the "hole in the heart"(ASD ) she had. We asked what would have caused it and the doctors said it can not be explained but also may be caused by maybe drugs or something consumed in early m...

Comforting Jaden's Sibling

We felt so loved and comforted through the many calls and friends and family who came to visit. However we noted that for baby gal and it not being deliberate , no one really was comforting her ..I guess we assumed she doesn't understand or we did not know how to deal with her grief. But truth be told , Samara knew and loved her brother so much. I was so scared of her asking about him because I didn't have an answer..but my beloved sat her down and explained to her that her brother went to be with the Lord in heaven. Of course she asked the whys and where  but she seemed to understand that he had left us. On the day of the funeral again he explained to her that we were going to say good bye to Jaden and she asked me for the first time and I said the same thing. It was bold  of Alex to sit her down and explain to her such a difficult thing, yet with such wisdom he used the basic words and she seemed content. Thanks a million hun, you are 1 in a million. From that day she asks...

It's Been Ten Days Now-Eulogy

It has been 10days since baby J went to be with the Lord . We lay his body to rest on Tuesday 13th November 2012 after having a funeral service which my beloved shared our dreams for Jaden and the lessons our boy taught us in those few days. JADEN JOSEF KAREGA EULOGY AND JOURNEY OF FAITH Our son, Jaden Josef Karega was born on Saturday 13 th October 2012 at 4.45pm at the Aga khan Hospital. He was a gift to Alex and Sylvia, a small brother to Samara Karega and a darling boy to many friends and relatives. Just to take you back, his both names were Hebrew, not just wonderful names but given in a calculated way. Jaden means God has heard.. while Josef means God will enlarge or increase. Josef further represents a family person, love, harmony, giving, good, noble and one who has concern for others. This is what we had spoken and declared upon Jaden’s life even before he was born. Baby J was very peaceful yet aggressive….kicking and all and at 2weeks his legs were firm to...

My Precious Family

 Baby Jaden as newborn  Big sister is so proud of carrying her brother  My lovely family  My babies  Big sister took this picture of mummy and baby boy  My precious babies just bonding  Our son  My boys Big sister was so proud and happy to have you in her life. She surprised me, every morning before school she would ask about you Jaden, immediately after school, she wanted to see your face..there was no hint of jealousy at all in her. We miss you my angel... Jaden Josef Karega, so peaceful and I thank God for allowing us to hold you and have precious memories. I miss you so much today, 1 week later my tears still flow freely, I miss the times we shared together my boy.

It All Belongs To You by Deitrick Haddon

It All Belongs To You- Deitrick Haddon My heart , My mind , My soul Belongs to you My love , My life It all belongs to you Belongs to you Belongs to you Chorus The songs , We sing They all belongs to you The air , We breathe It all belongs to you Belongs to You Yes, I surrender it all Yes, I turn it all over Yes, It all belongs to you It all belongs to you

The Beginning of Grief Journey

I am not sure where to start in this blog. There is so much to say and I will say it with time. I just want to say that God blessed us with a lovely handsome son on 13th October 2012. He was such a joy to us, family and friends. Jaden was very peaceful, he would just breastfeed, sleep sometimes, at times he would just want to be put down and stay awake. Baby gal was very  proud to be a big sister, she was all over her brother. Infact her new name in school was"big sister". Every time Jaden would cry or turn she would rush to peep and check whether he was awake..Every time she tried to carry him, she always leaned very close to him, giving him a kiss. It was so nice to see them both together. I shall share pictures of them soonest. Baby J had a small blockage in his aorta ..vessel that carries blood to the rest of the body and he needed a closed heart surgery. His surgery went well  on Thursday 8th 2012 and he was taken to ICU for observation and on Saturday, after we had ...